Leadership

Overconfidence – Good or Bad?

21 Aug
by Bridget DiCello

Today, I read an interesting article on overconfidence.  The author, Jessie States, references  studies on the connection between overconfidence and the high social status it brings.  He appears to be concerned about people’s confidence which leads them to believe, “they are more physically talented, socially adept and skilled at their jobs than they actually are,” which is unsubstantiated by actual skills and abilities.

I don’t disagree that most people feel they are above average, (which is impossible, statistically speaking).

However, I do strongly believe that 95% of people never come anywhere near their potential for greatness.  And often, it’s our heads that get in the way.  Not necessarily our intelligence, but our willingness to settle for less, not push ourselves and stay in our comfort zone.

Belief in your ability to accomplish great things, and the corresponding desire to participate without fear is very valuable.  The problem comes in when the overconfidence is not sincere, and is hiding fears about oneself, and leads to a feeling of entitlement instead of desire to work hard.

The overconfident person who truly has a positive self-image and a determination and persistence to work hard, will thrive in an environment where their performance is objectively measured, which is what can take that overconfidence and use it proactively to improve actual performance.

The author found that overconfident people who “believed they were better than others, even when they weren’t, were given a higher place in the social ladder.”  They were well liked people, and not considered pompous.  And, I’m not surprised.  Don’t we want to be around people who think positively about themselves and others?  I guess the “and others” part is the big difference.  If that confidence translates to a confidence about people overall, and enables them to encourage greatness in others, that is an attractive trait.

What does this tell us about ourselves as leaders?

  1. If you have a confidence about the work you do, where you are headed and the bright future ahead, and share that vision, that is contagious and people will like to follow you.
  2. Confidence is a great thing if it leads you to continual development of yourself, personally and professionally, and especially if you provide the same opportunities for your team.
  3. There is incredible potential out there to be discovered in yourself and others, and if the confidence you possess can lead you to jump in and try things, with your eyes open, and develop your skills along the way, your team will benefit – and they’ll like working for you!

The author felt it would be difficult to determine how to “de-emphasiz[e] the natural tendency toward overconfidence,” but I say, let’s not squash it, let’s channel and coach it to create greatness!

90 Day Reviews – Too Late!

05 Jul
by Bridget DiCello

A 90 day probationary period and review is customary in many companies.  And it may be company policy, so go ahead and follow it.  But, don’t expect it to be effective in the orientation or development of your new team members.

Ninety days is an incredibly long time to a new employee:

  • Many of their routines have been set,
  • their place in office politics has been initialized,
  • their best face is still on but they’ve figured out how things work and where they can cut corners (not necessarily to be lazy, just to get everything done)
  • they’ve accepted where they believe they can excel and what will be stumbling blocks
  • they’ve learned your style and what they think you expect, and
  • they are waiting to pass that 90 day mark, so they can let their guard down a little.

What’s so magical about 90 days?

Instead, the dialog needs to start during the hiring process, continue during orientation and turn into concrete, usable feedback very early in their employment.

What dialog? 

The conversation that communicates to an employee that we are excited to have you here, we’re energized about our ambitious company goals, we wish to help you best use and build upon your strengths, develop in your areas of weakness, access your potential and help you to continually contribute in new and exciting ways to this organization.

You do not want an employee to try their best, fail in several areas, hear at 90 days whether or not they still have a job, and if they do, worry about their review in a year, and hope they get a raise at that time.

At two weeks after their start date, every employee should receive written feedback about their progress.  This does not mean you expect them to know every task or be proficient at this time.  It is as simple as:

  • Here are three areas in which you have done particularly well in your first two weeks.
  • And here are three areas where I would like you to focus most in the next two weeks.

At four weeks of employment, they should again receive very similar written feedback.

This should continue monthly for 90 days.  This is an incredibly important time to build a foundation and set the tone.  Create the positive, determined and forward-looking dialog!

Making Progress on Goals Important to You

26 Jun
by Bridget DiCello

You can verbally communicate a goal to some employees and they will get it done.  Others need to see a goal in writing.  Others feel that goals are out there somewhere, but do not direct their daily work.  Ambitious employees feel that working hard today will lead to accomplishing the goal, but don’t see the pathway.  Big picture thinkers can hear your company goal and set their own goals for their team or themselves.

The best thing you can do as the leader is have clear goals communicated in writing to your team.

Yearly  – It is important they understand where the company and team is headed in the longer term.  They may not know what they need to do today to accomplish that goal, but realize that the discussion will continue on progress made towards the yearly goal.

Monthly – Based on what you want to accomplish in 12 months, and therefore, what you expect to accomplish this quarter, departments and individuals need to clearly understand their top priorities for the month.  To some people, this is intuitive, for others it is not.

Company/Department Monthly Goals – Do you know your company’s/department’s top goals for the month?  Are they way too ambitious for even a team twice the size of yours to achieve in 30 days?  Is the list lengthy?  Overly ambitious goals that are routinely not reached will become a demotivator and employees will lose their focus and drive.

Write 3-5 monthly goals that are the most important things your team needs to accomplish within the next 30 days.  This is in addition to routine work.  This is not all that you and your team will do.  You may make much more progress than this.  But, if you were to narrow it down, these are the most important things to get done.

Examples:

  1.  Hire a salesperson.
  2. Evaluate and make a decision on the new software program.
  3. Establish key company metrics and a method to measure them routinely.  (It’s amazing how many companies or departments don’t have them.)
  4. Complete 50% (8 of 16) of current backlog of projects.

Individual Monthly Goals – Does each employee know the top 3 to 5 goals they need to accomplish this month?  “Keep working really hard on everything on my plate, stay focused and make some progress.”  That’s a scary statement to a leader, but may be the answer from much of your team.  This ambitious employee, who means well, may still frustrate the manager and hold the team back.

Have each individual draft their own 3 to 5 goals for the month, based on your company’s monthly goals.  Ensure they know this is a draft and you will add your input and may make changes.  If you feel the employee does not have a grasp of what they need to do, skip their draft at first, and write the monthly goals for them.

Examples:

  1. Complete the tutorials for three software programs and evaluate them based on the following criteria (end user ease of use, inclusion of our main data points, compatibility with our accounting software and outputs).
  2. Complete performance evaluations on your three direct reports, including obtaining their self-assessment and drafting goals for each.
  3. Schedule time in your calendar each day and work on the backlog of projects, based on an agreed upon priority list, completing four projects by month end, while adding no new projects to the overdue list.

You will not see the results your team is capable of achieving if they are not focused and directed in their efforts.  Their daily efforts need to be focused on monthly goals they are striving to achieve, which are created in order to reach your company’s monthly goals.  Remember, to some employees, setting their individual monthly goals is intuitive and to some it is not.

Nonverbal Communication – Myth Debunked

27 Feb
by Bridget DiCello

There are a lot of messages that a person communicates besides with the words that they say.  If you pay attention, their body language can be a significant source of information.

However, if you’d really like to have the master list of what all the possible nonverbal body languages signs (eye contact, crossed arms, slouching, etc.) may mean, I’m afraid you’re out of luck.  Most “answers” and generalizations are just not true.

People act differently and communicate differently based on a lot of things, not only what they are feeling at the moment.  Not that there is not good information in those nonverbal signals, there is just not one list of the “right” answers that apply to every person in every situation.  Here’s a few examples:

  • Lack of eye contact means they are lying.  Well, the amount and nature of eye contact can be telling, but the exact moment it breaks may not be significant.
  • Folding arms means defensiveness.  Maybe. Or maybe they are getting comfortable, or thinking, or relaxed.  I’ve personally seen them all, and done them all.
  • Tone of voice is not the same for everyone.  Some people use tone to their advantage.  Others purposely avoid changes in tone and pitch. Others have their natural tone that follows them everywhere.
  • Squaring up to you.  Might mean they are becoming aggressive or simply interested.
  • Feet/shoulders away from you.  They could be getting comfortable or disinterested.
  • Nodding.  I’ve always said that when the employee nods, it means nothing.  They are probably just trying to get you to stop talking because you believe they agree.  They may want you to stop talking because they are confused, bored, uninterested, or just have other priorities at the moment.  A nog can also indicate agreement, politeness, “Go away!”, or “I get it!”
  • Hands closed.  They could be withholding information or maybe they just naturally sit that way.
  • Leaning forward could mean aggressiveness or disinterest.
  • Leaning back could mean they are thinking or they are disengaged.

Keep in mind that you can think about four times faster than someone naturally speaks.  That is why it is so hard to listen.  Your brain has so much excess capacity.  Therefore, when you speaking to someone, what they do nonverbally may or may not be directly related to the conversation.

What can nonverbal communication tell you?  Most importantly, nonverbal communication patterns must be learned.

What are the common patterns for the people with whom you are communicating?  What makes them change?  How do they hold themselves most of the time?  How do they feel most of the time?

  • Are they often nervous and defensive?  Then a change in body language may mean you are relieving their stress and opening up dialog.  That’s a good thing.
  • If they are often participative and productive, a change in body language may mean you have said or done something that has closed the conversation and lost their buy-in.  That needs to be addressed.

Determine what triggers them to change tone, posture, eye contact and movements and decide if that change is a good thing.  Then, you can adjust your communication in the moment based on their body language and achieve your desired results from the conversation.

And, by the way, words are important too, so brush up on your listening skills, and spend more than 25% of your energy listening to the words in order to gain insight on the entire communication message that the other person is saying!

Egotistical Jerk or Passionate Leader?

14 Feb
by Bridget DiCello

If you’ve ever had the boss who has said,

“My way or the highway!”

“…because I said so!”

“That’s just the way it is,” and

“Get it done yesterday – I don’t care how!”

you may be hesitant to come across like a demanding jerk to your employees.

Jim Collins in his description of a Level V Leader says that level of leadership is attained by a humble yet passionate leader.

So, when do you get tough and lay it on the line, even to the point of saying, “That’s just how it is!” to your employees?

You know you’re being a jerk when…

  1. There is a self-serving motive behind your rant like ego preservation, desire to win/they lose, or desire to intimidate.
  2. You do not take the time to let them speak
  3. You honestly don’t care what they think and don’t feel like they can contribute despite their subject matter expertise.

You know you are being a passionate leader when…

  1. You listen curiously and with genuine interest to what they are saying, combining empathy with high standards in your head.
  2. Your blood pressure starts to rise because they have/or continue to do something hurtful to accomplishing the company vision/mission/goals.
  3. You respond carefully and choose your words to avoid being hurtful AND present the mission/vision component with passion because that is the reason why their behavior is a problem.

You can get excited and passionate about your core values, vision, mission and goals.

You cannot scream and yell because someone made you mad and has frustrated you.

You can get determined and definite when what an employee did interfered with overall accomplishment of goals or the way you want your company to operate.

You cannot get miffed, sarcastic and rude because someone kept you personally from meeting your goal.

The mission, vision and core values of an organization are its backbone – the reason it exists and how business will be conducted.  This backbone is something to get excited about and no one will fault you if you get passionate and determined about it, as long as you treat them respectfully (no yelling, swearing, sarcasm, personal attacks or demeaning comments).  You may even appear egotistical if you are personally very invested in the core values and vision.  But a drive towards an admirable vision is always about more than just your desire to accomplish it, and that will come through to your team.

Plan for Consistency in 2012

04 Jan
by Bridget DiCello

When writing goals, the focus is on what we want to be different, how things will be improved and the areas we want to tackle in the upcoming quarter or year.  However, it’s important to not overlook what you really want to remain consistent.  Things that have enabled you to be successful this year and in the past might be taken for granted.

Doing the same things and expecting different results is the accepted business definition of insanity.  But more than that, doing the same things and expecting even the same acceptable results may be a lot to ask.  Things change.  People change.  Things do not stay the same.  People are not machines and consistency must be purposefully planned for.

What are the core components of your success that you need to remain consistent in 2012?  What is it about your approach, your systems, your customer service, your processes and your values that are the keys to your success?  Do you know?

When writing your goals for the upcoming month, quarter or year, take an inventory of what you consider to be your keys to success, identify the most important components, and determine what it is that will ensure continuity.

What is it that has brought you success?

  • If it is a single key employee that makes things happen, cross-train others.
  • If it is the way a process is running, document it, create checklists if necessary and ensure your team knows how important how they are doing things really is.
  • If it is the connections the owner, managers or key employees have nurtured, pinpoint the key activities that make those possible, should a key person take on a new role or need to leave, or you wish to increase the results you are achieving.
  • If it is your management team’s ability to make good strategic decisions, determine what makes that possible and expand the number of people with these capabilities.

If you want consistent success, the components that have made you successful need to be purposeful and routine.  If creating processes or systems is not in your nature, you need to task someone on your team with those skills with the role of pinpointing and systematizing those key components.  Otherwise, when a part of your success begins to slip, you try to play catch up, which may distract you from the new and exciting goals you have set for the future of your team.

Keeping their Minds on Work

07 Dec
by Bridget DiCello

With parties, cookies, Christmas cards, gift shopping and travel plans to distract your employees, it’s surprising they get anything done this time of year!

Christmas is my absolute favorite time of year!  Even with all the chaos it may bring, people are happy, there is magic in the air and I agree with Elvis, “Why can’t every day be like Christmas?”

Regardless of the joy of the season, businesses still need to operate and need their employees to stay engaged.  What is reasonable to expect from your employees?  Is the policy of no personal business, no internet shopping, no personal phone calls or texts at work reasonable?

However you answer those questions, it is essential that you to make a conscious decision about how you will handle the season.  Letting employees make their own decision of how much their focus and time needs to stay on work tasks could lead to a situation where you accept their behavior in the beginning and then decide to draw the line at some point, possibly in an unpopular way.

Talk about it.  Discuss with employees what you expect them to accomplish in the next month.  Will it be different than any other month?  What will be acceptable?  Can they take extra vacation because you are slow?  Less time off because you are more busy?  Can they use their work computer at lunch to do their shopping?  What do they expect to be able to do?  Set the expectation of what you want them to accomplish, reiterating goals expected to be achieved.

Have fun.  This is a time of year when most everyone expects to have some fun.  Provide the opportunities to do so.  Maybe there is a Christmas party out of the office, a festive lunch in the office, a “Dress in your Ugliest Christmas Sweater” day, a gift swap, a paid afternoon to go gift shopping, a service project you will all do together, or a travel agent stopping in one afternoon to help with plans.  Whatever might interest your team, plan the month and share the plan.

Businesses still need to operate despite the Christmas spirit that surrounds us all.  Set expectations clearly and plan some fun and you’ll be good to go!

The Confrontation Conversation

26 Oct
by Bridget DiCello

The Confrontation conversation is dreaded by many because it may appear to start a “fight” that may or may not be necessary.  You may be tempted to “leave well enough alone”.  However, if you are forward looking and have a brighter future in your mind for what is possible, it’s essential.

With that said, start by asking yourself these questions:

  • Do I need to address this issue?  Choose your battles carefully.  A problem ignored can blow up later.  However, nitpicking every detail will wear out a relationship with an employee.
  • Am I the right person to address it?  Is there someone else to whom the employee reports on this issue?  Is there someone who has a better working relationship and is in an appropriate position to address it?
  • Is now the right time to address it?  Are they as open and receptive as they ever will be?  Will waiting let the situation get worse or the impact of the conversation be less?

When you address a situation that you expect to be confrontational, take a moment, which I call the Opportunity Space (the moment between when someone does or says something and you respond) and ask yourself The Three Questions:

  1.  What do I really want to accomplish in the long term?  Keep in mind your long term objectives and don’t be side tracked with emotions in the moment.
  2. Where are they coming from?  Why is it that they are doing the things they are doing?  What is their perspective?
  3. How am I making them feel?  However they are feeling is okay, so avoid telling them not to feel the way they feel.  It’s what they do as a result that can become unacceptable.

If the confrontation goes badly, you might need to take a break and come back and address it when emotions have calmed down.  If the employee gets worked up and emotional, keep in mind it might be a defense mechanism to avoid having the conversation.  In that case, any break taken should be short and have the specific purpose of giving everyone time to calm down and come back to finish the conversation productively.

Getting People Engaged

23 Sep
by Bridget DiCello

Engaged people are those who are interested enough to do something.  Engagement means movement.  Action.

What makes people act?  A desire to act usually comes from a desire to reach something greater than where they are either because of discomfort with the current situation or a vision of what’s possible beyond the current reality.

What does that mean for you in trying to get team members, peers, associates, and employees engaged?  Create an Invitation and find Common Ground.

Create an Invitation:  I’ve heard it often said that people will act because someone asked them to.  Will you help someone who asks?  Will you get involved because someone you trust invites you to?  Will you respond when someone explains what they need you to do?

Too often, people may not get engaged in a process, in planning, in executing and in implementing because it is easier not to.  Easier not to put themselves out on a limb, extend beyond their level of confidence, assume their help or involvement is not needed or assume what they are currently doing is enough.  If you see possibility beyond where your team is currently operating, invite others to see what you see, and ask them for their specific participation.

“You’ve put a lot of time and effort into this.  I appreciate all you’ve done.   I can’t help thinking that we could make it even better if we…  Will you help me by …?”

Find Common Ground:  People act because there is something in it for them.  I don’t mean people are self-centered and selfish.  I mean that each of us operates from our own point of view and when something is exciting, important and valuable to us, we tend to get involved.

Have you ever learned something new or gained more in depth knowledge about a cause, a problem or a challenge, and then decided to get (more) involved?

Finding Common Ground requires that we have a conversation with whomever we are trying to get more engaged.  It means we share some of our passion, and let them respond and determine for themselves what it is they are excited about.  There are often many facets of a project, problem or situation and the specific reason we get excited may not be the same as another person, and yet we both can become avid workers towards the end goal.

“I was thinking about the reason we started working on this project and how exciting it will be when we achieve the goal of…  What is it that you are most excited about?”

Who on your team needs to be more engaged?  Who do you wish would be of more help to you in what you are trying to accomplish?  Have you issued the Invitation and do they see the Common Ground?

The Coaching Conversation

14 Sep
by Bridget DiCello

Coaching is having a series of conversations with an individual in order to help them access their hidden potential to achieve greater levels of success.

-          Bridget M. DiCello

It is essential that you have both “Conversations on the Go” as well as “Undivided Attention Meetings.”  When you see acceptable or unacceptable behaviors, sometimes you need to address them immediately for greatest impact.  Other times you need to get both the employee and yourself focused on their improvement in a planned meeting where you have each other’s undivided attention.  In which meeting you bring up an issue depends on the urgency of the needed change in behavior.  If you wait as an unacceptable behavior continues, your frustration increases as does the employee’s resistance to change – which makes the conversation more difficult when it does occur.

Conversations on the Go:

1.  You bring up the unacceptable behavior and get them talking.
“I’m concerned about… because…  What Happened?”

2.  Then you talk.  Explain current unacceptable behaviors describing them specifically.  “Your bad attitude” and “your lack of initiative” are not specific behaviors.

3.  Get commitment to precise, doable action from the employee.

4.  Determine a follow up date – it may be your monthly meeting with them.

Undivided Attention Meetings – Monthly meeting where each of your direct reports prepares for and attends a meeting with you.

This is not about how you can help them or what they think you or the company could do differently.  This is about them reporting on their progress and challenges.

According to set agenda both you and they have prior to the meeting:

1.   They report their successes first – according to goals you have set

2.  They report on set metrics, projects, goals, status

3.  They identify the areas where they have fallen short and what they will do differently.

4.  You compliment them on successes you’ve seen

5.  You comment on their performance that can be improved. (using specific examples of unacceptable and acceptable behaviors.)

6.  Get commitment to precise, do-able and measurable action.  Help them come up with action items and strategies.  This is not easy and may take time.  Dig in and really find a do-able action.  Use Clarifying Questions like, “Can you give me an example?” and “Can you be more specific?” and “What have you tried in the past?”  Watch for Smokescreens and Tangents. 

7.  Determine a follow-up date and follow-up.

The only way you can help your team to really access their potential and therefore move your team to a higher level of performance is if you coach them.  Even the best employees need your coaching.  Michael Jordan had a coach who pushed him to excel!

 

Page 3 of 512345

  • Think Growth!

    Subscribe to this weekly e-newsletter focused on growth strategy, building your business and leading your team.

    Click here to subscribe!

  • Testimonials

    Intense Gut Check

    “Bridget DiCello’s Leadership class was an intense gut check on how to do business. Business Owners, Executives, Non Profits, and Professionals can all benefit by learning how to manage teams and communicate effectively with employees. This has helped our company to bring up production and help increase the bottom line. Her classes and coaching have …

    Sane and Profitable!

    “Bridget has kept us sane and profitable! We hired Bridget to help us manage the chaos of our growing/successful Brand Marketing Agency when it was still in its infancy. She has provided guidance and solutions for: personnel hiring, management and motivation; time management and project coordination; profitability and goal setting; project/client delegation, etc. If you …

    To the next level…

    “Bridget is a value-add to any business! Her no nonsense approach to the world of business has been a huge reason for my success. Bridget is a class act who I trust to turn to whenever I have a dilemma in my business. I would highly recommend her services to any business owner or manager …

    Increased Productivity & Accountability

    “Bridget is a true expert in her field. Her methodology “clicked” with our corporate culture, enabling us to develop internal systems and safeguards that increased productivity and accountability of our staff. I would highly advise others to garner her services when needed.” – Gene Mangiante, Owner, Mangiante Photography